Identity Crisis

Several years ago, as I was approaching my retirement from the financial services industry, I attended a pre-retirement seminar.  During the discussion, one of the participants shared that while she’d love to retire someday, for nearly 40 years she’d been “Barbara from the bank”, and if she retired, she, “wasn’t sure who she would be!”  As she shared these concerns, she became overcome with emotions and began to weep. 

While initially I found myself initially caught off guard by her outward display of emotions, in almost the same instant, I said to myself, “boy, I’m sure glad I don’t have that problem!”

You see, I’ve always prided myself in having a well-balanced lifestyle.  During my career I certainly worked hard but also had several other activities that kept me busy.  I’ve always been involved with my church and have served on the boards of various community organizations.  With children, grandchildren and aging parents, I’m never at a loss for things to do and there are always situations where I’m “needed” and when called upon I'm happy to help.   

All of this is to say that I never anticipated that I would have an “identity crisis” when I retired.  Well, I couldn’t have been more wrong.  

This point was driven home for me in a powerful way shortly after I stopped working while attending a cocktail reception.  As is often the case, when meeting people for the first time in a setting like this, a common question is, “So tell me Leigh, what do you do for a living?”

For years my answer to this question had been, “I’m a senior vice president at a local bank where I oversee the trust department”.  However, the first time this question was posed to me post-retirement, I found myself tongue tied…not knowing how to answer.  That’s when I realized that my own identity, like “Barbara from the bank” was too tied up in what I did for a living.

I was reminded of this recently when I came across an article in Money magazine entitled There’s a Huge Step Toward Retirement Nearly 90% of Americans are Skipping: Planning for Retirement Isn’t Just About Money which discusses the emotional preparations needed for a successful retirement.

Irrespective of whether you’re currently retired or thinking of retiring, at some point in your future you’ll probably be working less than you are now.  In preparation for that ultimate eventuality, I think you’ll find the article I referenced above interesting reading.  Here’s the link:

https://money.com/emotional-preparation-needed-retirement-planning/?utm_medium=rss_synd&utm_source=applenews&xid=applenews